give or take a few

This blog was originally supposed to be called 47 stones. Then 48. Once I hit fifty, well, it was time to stop counting and start writing.

Yes, it's another blog about one woman's weight loss journey. It's really just for me but if you want to read along and offer some encouragement (or learn from my mistakes) you're welcome to join me.

About the name: I was in the park with my almost two-year old boy girl twins when the sun caught the reflection of the pea gravel. I swear, these little stones look just like mini-globules of fat. I counted out forty seven, pocketed them, carried them home, washed them up and put them on my desk. I thought I might keep two piles to track my progress. One, initially big pile on the left. As I lost weight, I was going to remove a stone for each pound and place it in the new pile on the right. Only they are all still sitting in the same spot on the left, gathering dust. And now I need to find three more.

I'm aware it sounds silly. I'm desperate. I've been looking for some mental trick to flip the switch, to make me stay present enough in this journey to make some progress. It was much easier before kids. Now I just don't have the time (or mental capacity, clearly) to remain in the game. I'm too easily distracted. I'm not nearly as vain as I used to be. I'm too tired.

So, anyway, here I go again. I've been dabbling with losing weight since the kids were born--and am ten pounds higher than my lowest post-pregnancy weight. I need to lose fifty. This week I am committing to writing down EVERY little (and not so little) bite that goes into my mouth. I can think of at least ten other things I should be doing to help me, but I am going to start small.

Until later. -m